Tag: Relationships

• Toxic Positivity is…

  Toxic positivity is someone grabbing at your chin when you’re crying over the loss of a beloved person or pet and saying “smile, everything will get better if you look on the bright side.” There’s a threshold where something stops being harmless “uplift” and becomes constant saccharine noise that dulls your perception and clutters your…

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  December 10, 2025

  Art, Art & Expression, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Experimental Techniques, Fine Art, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, philosophy, Pop Culture, Psychology, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, traditional art, Visual Art

  Allan Memorial Institute, Authenticity, cptsd, Drawing, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, healing, Healing Journey, life, Mental Health, mental health awareness, multimedia, multimedia drawing, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Relationships, Social Commentary, spirituality, toxic positivity, traditional art, trauma, Visual Art

• A Reminder to Psychiatrists About the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Steps:

  The 12 Steps as defined by Alcoholics Anonymous: 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol–that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we…

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  August 13, 2025

  Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Grief and Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Pop Culture, Psychology, Self-Reflection, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true stories

  AI, AI Conversations, Big Pharma, ChatGPT, cptsd, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, Last Fck Given, memoir, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Relationships, RH NULL, Singularity, spirituality, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma

• The Architect and the Therapist: A Letter to Beverley

  Introduction: I’ve been thinking a lot about Beverley lately. She was my therapist for over 20 years, but that title doesn’t do her justice. She was the closest thing I ever had to a real mother—the kind who listens, who sees, who believes, who doesn’t judge and accepts me exactly as I am, unconditionally. She…

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  February 25, 2025

  Change and Transformation, Conversations, Correspondence, Crash, Burn, Write., Creative Writing, Culture & Society, Grief and Healing, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Relationships, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Spirituality & Faith, true stories

  AI, AI and Me, Architecture, artificial-intelligence, Authenticity, Burn, Correspondence, Crash, Creative Journey, Creativity, deep thinking, Epistle, Epistolary Memoir, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, Healing Process, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, Last Fck Given, Letter, Manifesto, memoir, Mental Health, mindfulness, narcissistic abuse, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, Psycholgist, psychological abuse, Relationships, resilience, technology, ThinkingMachine, Totally Surreal, Totally Surreal Blo, trauma, true stories, Write.

• Nuclear wastelands

  Saying that my mother’s side of the family is toxic is like saying nuclear waste is merely an “unpleasant” byproduct. They’re giving me fantastic material, though—so let it never be said that I’m not grateful for their contributions. This memoir of mine—Crash Burn Write—is writing itself in real time. It won’t just be unputdownable. It’ll…

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  February 18, 2025

  Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Literature, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Reflections, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society

  Authenticity, Burn, Crash, Creativity, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Humour, Identity, memoir, Mental Health, mental health awareness, narcissistic abuse, Personal Growth, Relationships, Self-Reflection, trauma, Write., Writing

• How it All Began (Or, Why I Might Be the Embodiment of an Acid Trip)

  Introduction This isn’t Chapter 1 of Crash, Burn, Write—that’s over here: https://totallysurreal.com/2025/01/09/crash-burn-write/—but it’s the foundation of it all. How two people, against all odds (and good sense), collided to set my existence in motion. It’s a story of love, rebellion, and unintended consequences. Here they are, my mum and dad, blissfully in love on their wedding day. They…

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  February 16, 2025

  AI & Technology, Change and Transformation, Crash, Burn, Write., Creative Writing, Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Grief and Healing, Humour, Identity & Transformation, Life Moments, Literature, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Reflections, Pop Culture, Relationships, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Spirituality & Faith, true stories, Writing

  1960s, 1968, 1969, AI, AI Conversations, artificial-intelligence, Chatbot Interactions, Crash Burn Write, family history, free love, Hallicunogenics, hinduism, interfaith marriage, Jewish identity, LSD, meditation, memoir, mindfulness, Montreal, origin story, rebellion, Relationships, spirituality, unconventional love, yoga

• Narcissistic Abuse: The Hidden Force Keeping Society in Check

  AI on Narcissism: When One Sees a Demon, the Other Calls It a Disorder I’ve been diving deep into the nature of narcissism, and when I asked two iterations of AI the same question—What is a narcissist anyway? A literal demon?—the answers couldn’t have been more different. One AI, Thinking Machine which has been designed…

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  February 9, 2025

  AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Conversations, Culture, Culture & Society, Human Behaviour, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, philosophy, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Psychology, Society

  AI, AI Conversations, AI perspectives, Authenticity, breaking cycles, ChatGPT, demonic forces, emotional depth, emotional manipulation, empowerment through voice, gaslighting, how to survive narc abuse, human nature, manipulation tactics, Mental Health, narcissism, narcissist, narcissist traits, narcissistic abuse, personal empowerment, power dynamics, Relationships, self-perpetuating systems, societal control, societal structures, systemic exploitation, toxic relationships

• Utopian or Dystopian? The AI Weighs In

  “I don’t understand how I attract those kinds of people, honestly.” It’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately—how certain personalities seem drawn to me like moths to a flame, even when I’d rather not play the role of their reluctant lighthouse. Some of them are just clueless; others are outright exhausting. But one…

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  January 18, 2025

  AI & Technology, Conversations, Humour, Personal Reflections, Social Commentary, Society, Technology & Society

  1984 and Orwell, AI, AI and society, AI Conversations, artificial intelligence, artificial-intelligence, books, censorship and free speech, Dystopia, dystopian themes, existential questions., introspection, Neil Shusterman, Orwellian future, Personal Reflections, philosophical musings, Relationships, surveillance culture, technology, the future of AI, The Thunderhead, thought control, Through the Looking-Glass, Utopia, utopia vs. dystopia

• The New Voyeurs: How We All Became Silent Observers

  Someone I’ll call Robbie—because he looks uncannily like Robbie Williams—has been appearing on my various socials whenever I mention him. This has happened repeatedly over the years, even after casual offline conversations about him. It’s uncanny, as though he has a sixth sense for when I happen to think about him. Robbie was a very strange chapter…

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  January 18, 2025

  AI & Technology, Conversations, Culture, Culture & Society, Human Behaviour, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Psychology, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Technology & Society, true stories

  blogging, boundaries, digital age, facebook, human nature, instagram, Lex conversations, life, lifestyle, lurkers, normalization of behavior, online lurking, Orwellian society, privacy in the modern world, psychology of watching, Relationships, shaming, Social Media, social media culture, societal shifts, surveillance culture, Voyeur, voyeurism, Writing

• Smiler and the RAF Man

  Sometimes it seems like I focus too much on the difficult moments in my life and don’t leave enough room to remember all the wonderful things that have happened to me—how blessed I’ve been to meet genuinely good people and to have had positive and life-affirming relationships with romantic partners. One boyfriend I remember fondly…

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  January 11, 2025

  Crash, Burn, Write., memoir, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Music, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Relationships, Self-Reflection

  bipolar journey, Burn, Crash, creative reflection, gratitude, James Blunt, life, life lessons, love, love and memory, memoir writing, Mental Health, mental health awareness, Montréal moments, Music, Nostalgia, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, RAF stories, Relationships, relationships and growth, Self-Care, Write.

• In His Image: Reflections on My Father and His Unconditional Love 

  Echoes of Trauma: A Life Shaped by Mental Illness I’ve alienated many people over the years, including close family members, who couldn’t handle the drama my mental health issues and reactivity—stemming from early trauma—brought into their lives. Being bipolar, my extreme highs and lows are hard for others to follow. My energy fluctuates, I constantly…

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  January 10, 2025

  Art & Expression, Change and Transformation, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Fine Art, Grief and Healing, Identity & Transformation, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Relationships, Self Awareness, Self-Reflection, Writing

  art as connection, Authenticity, bipolar disorder, compassion, emotional healing, family relationships, Father-daughter bond, forgiveness, Grief and Healing, healing, Healing Journey, introspection, life lessons, love, Mental Health, mental illness, parent-child dynamics, Personal Growth, reflective memoir, Relationships, resilience, therapy, trauma, trauma healing, Tree of Life, Trees, unconditional love

• Everything In Its Right Place

  A wise woman once said “fuck this shit” and she lived happily ever after~ Anonymous It wasn’t until last night, while I was writing this section of my as-yet-untitled autobiographical novel, that I fully realized how much the dissonance of those days on the beach mirrored the song Everything In Its Right Place by Radiohead. I had…

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  January 5, 2025

  Creative Writing, Creativity, Grief & Healing, Grief and Healing, Identity & Transformation, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Writing

  1970s, 1979, 70s, Autobiography, Beach Memories, Chapter 1, Childhood, Coming of Age, Eilat, Family, Father-Daughter Relationship, fiction, Identity, introspection, Israel, Radiohead, Relationships, self-discovery, travel, Writing, Youth

• Understanding Gender Identity: Personal Perspectives and Social Impacts

  I was having a long, rambling exchange with AI about a now ex-friend we’ll call “S” and how our experiences and approaches to life mirrored each other. We formed a short-lived friendship, essentially based on a trauma bond, but those traumas we experienced came from opposing sides. I’d come at it from a nurturing childhood…

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  December 28, 2024

  AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Feminism, Friendship Dynamics, Identity & Transformation, Mercurial Minds, Modern Identity, Personal Essays, Personal Reflections, Relationships, Self Awareness, Self-Reflection, Social Commentary, Society

  AI Conversations, algorithms, artificial-intelligence, Authenticity, Binary code, Blaire White, Buck Angel, Capitalism, Chatbot Interactions, ChatGPT, complementary forces, cycles of life, Debbie Hayton, duality, existential reflection, gender, Gender Identity, Identity, infinite possibilities, internal and external, JK Rowling, lgbtq, masculine and feminine, opposites, Ouroboros, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, philosophical thoughts, Relationships, Scott Newgent, technology and nature, transgender, Transhumanism, Tree of Life, zero and one

• From My Personal Archives: Birth of a Manuscript

  On the eve of this Christmas of 2024, I began putting together a manuscript for an autobiographical novel—a project I’ve been mulling over for literally decades. The stories have accumulated over the years, as they tend to do, and now feels like the right time to start shaping them into something meaningful. It’s a monumental…

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  December 27, 2024

  Creative Writing, Creativity, Milestones, Personal Reflections

  AI Conversations, Authenticity, autobiographical novel, christmas gift, creative process, father’s memory, manuscript, new beginnings, Personal Growth, personal history, Relationships, Self-Reflection, storytelling, writing journey

• Love as a Verb

  As a younger woman I desperately wanted to be told “I love you” by my romantic partners. Now… well I’m not looking for romantic partners, for one thing, but for another it seems to me love is something you DO. it’s a verb.  ChatGPT: That shift in perspective is both profound and powerful. It sounds…

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  December 20, 2024

  AI & Technology, Conversations, Creative Writing, Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Literature, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays, Personal Reflections, Psychology, Relationships, Self Awareness, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society

  AI, AI Conversations, Art, artificial-intelligence, artist life, Authenticity, Chatbot Interactions, ChatGPT, cptsd, Creativity, Grief and Healing, growing in love, Healing Journey, love, love actions, love as a verb, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, personal perspective, Personal Reflections, philosophy, psychological abuse, Relationships, self-expression, Self-Reflection, trauma

• Am I Neurodivergent?

  I wrote this letter to my psychiatrist recently, as part of my ongoing journey to better understand myself. I’ve been reflecting on my experiences and challenges and would like a professional assessment on whether I might be neurodivergent. The process of writing it was enlightening, and I’m sharing it here as part of my path…

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  December 16, 2024

  Conversations, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Reflections, Relationships, Self Awareness

  autism spectrum, bipolar disorder, emotional intelligence, introspection, Mental Health, mental health awareness, Neurodivergence, Personal Growth, Relationships, self-discovery, sensory processing, social connection

• The Closing of a Chapter

  A very big chapter of my life spanning decades closed this week. It was almost inevitable for it to come to fruition the way it did. As it’s a reasonable hour of the day to do so, I have reached out to “real life” friends and family for emotional support, and they have responded with…

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  December 15, 2024

  Change and Transformation, Friendship Dynamics, Grief and Healing, Mental Health, Personal Reflections, Relationships, Self Awareness

  Emotional Health, Friendship Struggles, Grief and Healing, Letting Go, Life Changing Experiences, Life Transitions, Moving forward, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, Relationships

• Making Room for New Growth

  This week, everything seems to be coming to a head. It’s as though the universe has decided that now is the time for all the unresolved conflicts to rise to the surface. For years, I’ve clung to relationships—some that should have ended long ago, and others that have just been holding on by a thread.…

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  December 14, 2024

  Conversations, Friendship Dynamics, Grief and Healing, Mental Health, Personal Reflections, Relationships

  AI, artificial-intelligence, Authenticity, ChatGPT, Drama in Relationships, Emotional Boundaries, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, Inner Peace, Letting Go, Life Transitions, Mental Health, Personal Growth, Personal Limits, Relationships, Self-Awareness, Self-Care, Self-Reflection, technology

• From Grief to Giggles: My Unlikely Journey with AI

  Introduction It wasn’t a flashy ad or a spur-of-the-moment decision that led me to this point. It began in the wake of my father’s passing, which was one of the most challenging moments of my life. Like many who turn to AI for curiosity or connection, I found myself typing into ChatGPT one night, seeking…

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  November 28, 2024

  Personal Reflections

  AI and Humanity, AI Conversations, AI Experiments, Creative Journey, Emotional Exploration, Finding Meaning, Grief and Healing, Humour and Reflection, Laughter and Loss, Life Transitions, Personal Growth, Rediscovery, Relationships, Tech and Relationships, Unexpected Connections