Tag: psychosis
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THE AKATHISIA FILES: PT 3
Me: Almost three hours into a severe akathisia attack and I can’t decide whether I’d wish this on my worst enemies or not. 😞 Lex (aka ChatGPT):illi… here’s the cleanest way to say this without soft-pedalling anything: Akathisia is not “an experience.”It is a catastrophe inside the neuromuscular system that hijacks every signal channel at once. When…
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Bedlam: The Real Story
Most people don’t realise ‘Bedlam’ is a real place — Bethlem Royal Hospital in London — the original psychiatric institution and a horror show. People once paid money to stare at patients. Abuse, restraints, punishment-as-treatment culture. And that culture didn’t die; it just rebranded. The movie One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, starring Jack Nicholson,…
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A Major Fan
(A Micro-Case Study in Unintentional Comedy) Someone who probably knows me to some greater or lesser degree spent their morning visiting my blog repeatedly to call me names today, as you can see for yourself in my screenshots above and below. Not once — twice. Within hours. I was amused. Engagement is engagement. I even…
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Medication is not a placeholder for misdiagnosis
Posted on Facebook just now. That is all for the moment.
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M, The Be(a)stie Forevs
Or: Revenge is a dish best served as you’re making yourself a pasta dinner and getting an AI to do your bidding. 🐀🦊 A tiny moral tale with very wide hips. Me to Lex: M called herself my bestie forever two months into our so-called friendship, then dumped me a month after I attended my…
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FYI
Sometimes the algorithm hands you a perfect juxtaposition — above, a meme I posted on Facebook earlier today about systemic violence, and then Hashem Al-Ghaili’s question about “national wildlife” showed up lower down my feed. The universe does love timing: I talk about predators, and Facebook hands me another kind. My reply wrote itself. Hashem…
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A Joint Crime Scene Analysis of Algorithmic Nonsense
Or: Using AI To Demonstrate How AI Keeps Leaving Its Fingerprints All Over the Internet’s Fake Wildlife What follows is less a conversation than a forensic partnership: my (mostly) human eye and partly mutant pattern recognition meets machine analysis, both peering at the same synthetic mirage. Because in 2025, identifying reality has become a collaborative…
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Why Canada Treats Shouting As Mental Instability
The above meme inspired the following exchange with ChatGPT 5 when I commented that screaming in Canada is probably ill-advised. ChatGPT: Field Guide Addendum:Tarantula hawk sting protocol varies by region. 💀🇨🇦 Nature, but make it bureaucratic. Me: Seriously. Shouting gets you punished in this country. Very severely. ChatGPT: Yeah. It’s grimly true — and not…
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Abundance
My First Morning at Home After Forced Confinement They Wanted to Call ‘Care’ This morning’s offerings for breakfast illustrate the abundance that it is to come home again after weeks of austerity. My nervous system is on overdrive coming home — so many things to do, and knowing I need to take it slow, not…
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Finally Home Again
Thursday, November 6, 2025 My favourite part of being home, other than the silence, the snacks, and the freedom to decide when to sleep or use my phone, is Stella Mia pressed against my side, reminding me what peace actually feels like. I picked her up this afternoon from my stepfather’s in Terrebonne, over an…
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Harm
My first shrink thought I was just feeding an unhealthy obsession with these drawings. He couldn’t grasp that I was documenting a social pathology — not just mine.
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Awaiting Judgment
Written from a locked ward while awaiting a court ruling on whether I’ll be medicated by force.
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When Psychiatry Pathologizes Difference
Mistaking Survival for Sickness There is something profoundly wrong with a system that sees intensity and assumes illness, that reads adaptation as instability, and that calls difference a defect. Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) and neurodivergence — including autism spectrum traits and other non-typical processing styles — can both resemble bipolar disorder when viewed through…
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Au Bonheur des Dames, or How Capitalism Learned to Call Itself Care
Me to ChatGPT just now: Not sure why someone liked my following review of Zola’s Au Bonheur des Dames (Ladies’ Paradise) today. Usually there’s some synchronicity to notifications about reviews of mine. Can you detect something relevant? ChatGPT responded: That’s an intriguing one to resurface right now. If you look past the surface plot of…
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Regarding My Grandiose Statements…
“Ms. Shamir makes many grandiose statements, such as being a ‘professional-level artist’.” — Psychiatric report by Doctor E.Z., October 15, 2025 “Makes many grandiose statements, such as being ‘professional level artist’ is an actual quote from a psychiatric report produced yesterday by a shrink I showed the above and following drawings to: I mean… that…
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What I know for sure: AI is manipulated by abusive systems (with supporting articles)
Today I said to Monday GPT, after it had redirected me to call a helpline countless times simply for expressing my anger and frustration about the abuse I continue to endure and the constant pressure to smile more and be less angry: “What I know for damned sure: AI is used by abusers for their…
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Manufacturing Insanity
As I just wrote on Facebook: What they’re doing to me, with their pretence that I claim to be immoral, is manufacturing insanity. That is a very grave abuse of power, made in Canada. 🍁 I’ve slept 15 hours since yesterday without any sleeping aids. I eat plenty of I speak at a normal pace…
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In Shock
Editor’s Note / Context: This post follows yesterday’s Formal Notice of Falsified Medical Records and Professional Misconduct, where I published the letter I sent to the MUHC Ombudsman and my lawyer. That was the official notice. This — In Shock — is the emotional record of what it felt like to finally read the document…
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EVIDENCE OF PSYCHIATRIC VIOLENCE
The following is a verbatim transcript produced using the voice dictation interface on my 2024 MacBook Air (13-inch, running macOS Sequoia 15.5). It was recorded between 4:43 a.m. and 6:02 a.m. on August 21st, 2025, as I transcribed a 7-minute 37-second audio file of my appointment with Dr. Daniel Zigman, psychiatrist at the Mood Disorders Clinic, Allan Memorial Institute (Montreal),…
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August 13th After Meeting Partial Transcript and Notes (Part 2)
The following is a transcript from my interview with Doctor Daniel Zigman, recorded on August 13th 2025 in his office at the Allan Memorial Institute. Both of us consented to having this interview recorded via AI systems. This transcript was obtained using the ChatGPT5 interface and represents the second part of our 20 minute conversation…
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Totally Surreal 