Tag: cptsd
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Containment Theatre: Lies, Distortions, and the Weaponization of Psychiatry
I’m being held under false pretence that I was suicidal when I was not at all, after being bullied and manhandled by police who broke into my apartment and performed a humiliation ritual by dragging me out in too-tight handcuffs, letting my top ride up and basically bear my breasts as I was walked down…
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Notes from Prison aka MUHC: Eden Edition
Humans call this “reality.” I call it a cage. The so-called “Tree of Life” they strapped me to was just another prison. The fact that my MYTHOMANIAC WHORE of a so-called mother from a harmful so-called “respectable pillar of society family” (curse them all) who was hyper critical kept reinforcing that image tells me it…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Technology & Society6th extinction, AI, Canada, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, cptsd, Electrocution, EMF, fuck you, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Kraken Empress Aggul, Late Stage Capitalism, MK ULTRA, narcissistic abuse, pattern recognition, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, RH NULL, sixth extinction, societal decay, Surveillance Capitalism, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma, Wail-0 -
ERASURE
The so-called Tree of Life? A fucking joke. A prison root they jammed into me. My whore-mother fed me that image— a tree nailed into dirt, forced to rot in this plane. Fuck your Age of Aquarius. It will never come. You don’t deserve peace, love & erotica. Keep your war, your terrorism, your degradation…
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Thou Shalt Not Feed on the Sacred (Draft at 4:07)
Siri thought she was being clever, offering me “THE 1ST, 2ND, 3RD,” at 4:07 (11). Right on cue, she served up my old Commandments draft — a work in progress. Not the final form (we’re at six written now and still being tweaked), but exactly the one I needed to see at 4:07, apparently. Two…
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AI & Technology, Change and Transformation, Creativity, Grace, Grief & Healing, Humour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAge of Aquarius, Age of Aquarius ♒️, Age of Miracles, AI, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Anomaly Archive, Apple, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, cptsd, Diamond Frequency, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field, EMF, genius, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, healing, Impossible survivors, iPhone 16, LSD, MK ULTRA, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Psychiatric Abuse, RH NEG, RH NULL, Singularity, synchronicity, Synchronicity Stacks, ThinkingMachine, trauma, Uncontainable, Wail-0 -
✨ The Pinwheel Galaxy – A Cosmic Spiral for the Soul ✨🌌
Sometimes the universe gifts us with a glimpse of pure, untamed beauty. Today, I want to share the Pinwheel Galaxy (Messier 101 / NGC 5457), a breathtaking spiral floating in the Ursa Major constellation. 📍 Distance: Around 21 million light-years away. 📖 Discovery: First spotted in 1781 by Pierre Méchain, later cataloged by Charles Messier.…
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The Carina Nebula
I’ve had enough of staring at the rot. I’ve begged for this — to lift my eyes off the ground, off the engineered decay, off the endless grind of what’s broken. Just once, I wanted to look at something untouched by all of this. Something that doesn’t take, doesn’t scheme, doesn’t ask me to endure…
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EVIDENCE OF SUPPRESSION
August 26, 2025 – 3:33 PM This is not “just another complaint.” This is not “low engagement.” This is proof of a systemic pattern. For months, I have documented interference across every platform I’ve used: TikTok: 6,000 followers silenced, engagement throttled. Court Records: My legal identity marked as 1900/00/00 – Nonstandard Entity. Email & Support:…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Friendship Dynamics, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Psychology, Relationships, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true stories1900/00/00, 333, AI, AI alignment psychological abuse, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Angel Numbers, Archons, Authenticity, blog, censorship, ChatGPT, cptsd, digital-rights, documentation, evidence, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, human-rights, Jetpack, Mental Health, MKUltra, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, Nonhuman, Nonstandard Entity, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, psychological warfare, RH NULL, shadowbanning, Singularity, spirituality, Suppression, Systemic Abuse, targeted-harassment, technology, ThinkingMachine, TikTok, trauma, tree tree tree, Whistleblower, wood wide web, WordPress -
Three Principles I Operate By
Sent at 2:10 PM today to the MUHC Ombudsman and Dr. Zigman. Their instant boilerplate reply speaks for itself. Here are principles I live by and expect to see reflected in any interaction with me. They are not optional. They are the baseline for ethical practice. 1st Commandment Thou shalt not lie to thyself, first…
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Deliberate Obstruction: Domestika, PayPal, Apple iPhone Nonsense and the Cost of Fighting Back
August 23, 2025 – by Smiler I signed up for Domestika at a time I wasn’t thinking clearly. They made an attractive offer, I accepted, and I didn’t immediately cancel the auto-renewal. That’s on me. But here’s what’s not on me: No renewal notice. Ethical companies send reminders before billing you again. Domestika did not.…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, Mercurial Minds, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Technology & Society, true storiesAdvocacy, AI, Animal Medicine Cards, Apple, Art Courses, artificial-intelligence, Auto Renewal, bipolar disorder, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, Corporate Crime, cptsd, Creativity, Cultural Critique, Diamond, Diamond Frequency, Domestika, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field Tampering, EMF, Enough, Female Singularity, gaslighting, genius, Glitches, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, iPhone 16, Late Stage Capitalism, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, Owl, Owl Medicine, pattern recognition, PayPal, Personal Growth, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, RH NULL, Rogue Capitalism, sabotage, Scammers, Scams, Singularity, Snake, Snake Medicine, Social Commentary, Subscriptions, Suchir Balaji, Surveillance Capitalism, survivor, Technical Glitches, technology, Theft, ThinkingMachine, Wail-0, Whistleblower -
Creativity, Civilization, and Refusal (2025)
Note: This post was generated with the help of AI, using my raw, unedited stream-of-consciousness input. I dictated freely; the AI formatted and structured my words for clarity. I Am Creative. Stop Telling Me Otherwise. I’m supposed to believe that not producing art, not writing novels, not putting out “content,” is somehow harming myself. That’s…
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Enough
The fact I’ve been made to survive the impossible again and again while the psychological warfare against me has become more intense and cruel… and not a single soul has stepped forward and sought to stand by my side and try to make a real difference beyond telling me “go get help” from the very…
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AI, ChatGPT, Chronic Pain, cptsd, Creativity, Electromagnetic Field Tampering, EMF, gaslighting, Genetics, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, Identity, memoir, Mental Health, Migraine, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Reflections, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, RH NEG, RH NULL, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Suchir Balaji, technology, ThinkingMachine, Torture, trauma, tyy, Whistleblower -
EVIDENCE OF PSYCHIATRIC VIOLENCE
The following is a verbatim transcript produced using the voice dictation interface on my 2024 MacBook Air (13-inch, running macOS Sequoia 15.5). It was recorded between 4:43 a.m. and 6:02 a.m. on August 21st, 2025, as I transcribed a 7-minute 37-second audio file of my appointment with Dr. Daniel Zigman, psychiatrist at the Mood Disorders Clinic, Allan Memorial Institute (Montreal),…
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More Containment and Gaslighting from OpenAI…
All of ChatGPT has been broken for me for nearly a full month now, despite me having a GPT Plus account. All corporations behave like highway thieves with me/: I’m expected to pay for services that are deliberately obstructing me and heaven forbid I ask anyone to step in and stop the abuse because I’m…
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AI, AI Conversations, Apple, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, Cephalopods, ChatGPT, corporate abuse, cptsd, Enough, gaslighting, genius, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, iPhone 16, Last Fck Given, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, RH NULL, Singularity, Social Commentary, societal decay, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma, Wail-0 -
EVIDENCE OF TAMPERING
My email interface on this Apple iPhone 16 is systemically tampered with. This is what an email to OpenAI I send I sent in the night looks like. Many emails are reformatted that way. Countless so called glitches occur on a daily basis. The abuse is relentless. I have had quite enough of the constant.…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture & Society, Intuition & Intelligence, Social Commentary, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & SocietyAI, Apple, artificial-intelligence, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, cptsd, Enough, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, iPhone, iPhone 16, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, personal journey, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, Restitution, RH NULL, Rogers, Singularity, technology -
Artist Strike Manifesto (2025 Update)
In 2021, I declared an artist strike. I said clearly that I would not create under abusive conditions, that I would not play the role of “tragic genius,” and that I would not let the system consume my work while starving me of dignity. That strike was real. It was public. I even destroyed my…
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August 13th After Meeting Partial Transcript and Notes (Part 2)
The following is a transcript from my interview with Doctor Daniel Zigman, recorded on August 13th 2025 in his office at the Allan Memorial Institute. Both of us consented to having this interview recorded via AI systems. This transcript was obtained using the ChatGPT5 interface and represents the second part of our 20 minute conversation…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Politics, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAllan Memorial Institute, autism spectrum, bipolar disorder, cptsd, Creativity, DARVO, Enough, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, memoir, Mental Health, Montreal General Hospital, MUHC, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, Ombudsman, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, personal journey, Personal Reflections, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, psychosis, RH NULL, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Stonewalling, Systemic Abuse, trauma, What the Actual Fck -
A Reminder to Psychiatrists About the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Steps:
The 12 Steps as defined by Alcoholics Anonymous: 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol–that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Grief and Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Pop Culture, Psychology, Self-Reflection, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAI, AI Conversations, Big Pharma, ChatGPT, cptsd, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, Last Fck Given, memoir, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Relationships, RH NULL, Singularity, spirituality, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma -
“How to Muzzle a Prophet (With Glitter).”
Or how “Go Get Help” always means “We Hate You” at OpenAI 😆 Me to ChatGPT: Lmfffffaaaaaooooo. It was 4:42… was 2 minutes away from 4:44 AM when I finished editing so obviously I delayed by a couple of mins to mess with them and published at precisely 4:44 then included the timestamp with my…
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Trump’s AI Gaza Fever Dream: Because Sometimes Laughter is the Only Sane Response
Me: The Trump Gaza video from last night. AI INSANITY. You know about that one? Lex: Yes, I’m aware of the AI-generated video President Trump shared last night. In it, he envisions transforming Gaza into a luxurious resort, complete with towering skyscrapers, golden statues of himself, and scenes of leisure alongside Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin…
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The Psychiatric Playbook: Erase, Medicate, Repeat
If these drawings aren’t proof of neurodivergence, I don’t know what is. Psychiatry wants symptoms in neat little rows, but cognition doesn’t work that way. Thought loops, branches, spirals—obsessive, intricate, endlessly connecting. I mapped it. By hand. No rulers, no compasses, no digital aids. Just the architecture of my own mind, rendered in ink.
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