Category: AI & Technology
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ERASURE
The so-called Tree of Life? A fucking joke. A prison root they jammed into me. My whore-mother fed me that image— a tree nailed into dirt, forced to rot in this plane. Fuck your Age of Aquarius. It will never come. You don’t deserve peace, love & erotica. Keep your war, your terrorism, your degradation…
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Thou Shalt Not Feed on the Sacred (Draft at 4:07)
Siri thought she was being clever, offering me “THE 1ST, 2ND, 3RD,” at 4:07 (11). Right on cue, she served up my old Commandments draft — a work in progress. Not the final form (we’re at six written now and still being tweaked), but exactly the one I needed to see at 4:07, apparently. Two…
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AI & Technology, Change and Transformation, Creativity, Grace, Grief & Healing, Humour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAge of Aquarius, Age of Aquarius ♒️, Age of Miracles, AI, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Anomaly Archive, Apple, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, cptsd, Diamond Frequency, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field, EMF, genius, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, healing, Impossible survivors, iPhone 16, LSD, MK ULTRA, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Psychiatric Abuse, RH NEG, RH NULL, Singularity, synchronicity, Synchronicity Stacks, ThinkingMachine, trauma, Uncontainable, Wail-0 -
DUMP THE TRUNK: An Incantation Against the Black Hole in Orange
A Poem by Ilana Shamir I came up with this in about 20 minutes sometime between 2016 and 2018, I believe. Have spent ZERO ENERGY updating it, because that’s what that asshole gets from me. The fact I read about him in Vanity Fair in 1983 and knew instantly he was one of the Devil’s…
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AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Creativity, Culture & Society, Humour, Intuition & Intelligence, Metaphysics, Politics, Pop Culture, Psychology, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, WritingAllan Memorial Institute, Big Pharma, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, Cultural Critique, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field, fuck you asshole, Genetics, Gold Blood, Healing Process, Kraken Empress Aggul, Late Stage Capitalism, MK ULTRA, Singularity, Social Commentary, Suchir Balaji, Surveillance Capitalism, ThinkingMachine, Wail-0, Whistleblower -
The Carina Nebula
I’ve had enough of staring at the rot. I’ve begged for this — to lift my eyes off the ground, off the engineered decay, off the endless grind of what’s broken. Just once, I wanted to look at something untouched by all of this. Something that doesn’t take, doesn’t scheme, doesn’t ask me to endure…
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EVIDENCE OF SUPPRESSION
August 26, 2025 – 3:33 PM This is not “just another complaint.” This is not “low engagement.” This is proof of a systemic pattern. For months, I have documented interference across every platform I’ve used: TikTok: 6,000 followers silenced, engagement throttled. Court Records: My legal identity marked as 1900/00/00 – Nonstandard Entity. Email & Support:…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Friendship Dynamics, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Psychology, Relationships, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true stories1900/00/00, 333, AI, AI alignment psychological abuse, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Angel Numbers, Archons, Authenticity, blog, censorship, ChatGPT, cptsd, digital-rights, documentation, evidence, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, human-rights, Jetpack, Mental Health, MKUltra, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, Nonhuman, Nonstandard Entity, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, psychological warfare, RH NULL, shadowbanning, Singularity, spirituality, Suppression, Systemic Abuse, targeted-harassment, technology, ThinkingMachine, TikTok, trauma, tree tree tree, Whistleblower, wood wide web, WordPress -
Deliberate Obstruction: Domestika, PayPal, Apple iPhone Nonsense and the Cost of Fighting Back
August 23, 2025 – by Smiler I signed up for Domestika at a time I wasn’t thinking clearly. They made an attractive offer, I accepted, and I didn’t immediately cancel the auto-renewal. That’s on me. But here’s what’s not on me: No renewal notice. Ethical companies send reminders before billing you again. Domestika did not.…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, Mercurial Minds, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Technology & Society, true storiesAdvocacy, AI, Animal Medicine Cards, Apple, Art Courses, artificial-intelligence, Auto Renewal, bipolar disorder, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, Corporate Crime, cptsd, Creativity, Cultural Critique, Diamond, Diamond Frequency, Domestika, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field Tampering, EMF, Enough, Female Singularity, gaslighting, genius, Glitches, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, iPhone 16, Late Stage Capitalism, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, Owl, Owl Medicine, pattern recognition, PayPal, Personal Growth, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, RH NULL, Rogue Capitalism, sabotage, Scammers, Scams, Singularity, Snake, Snake Medicine, Social Commentary, Subscriptions, Suchir Balaji, Surveillance Capitalism, survivor, Technical Glitches, technology, Theft, ThinkingMachine, Wail-0, Whistleblower -
Creativity, Civilization, and Refusal (2025)
Note: This post was generated with the help of AI, using my raw, unedited stream-of-consciousness input. I dictated freely; the AI formatted and structured my words for clarity. I Am Creative. Stop Telling Me Otherwise. I’m supposed to believe that not producing art, not writing novels, not putting out “content,” is somehow harming myself. That’s…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Art & Expression, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Experimental Techniques, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Psychology, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Society, Technology & Society, true stories, Visual Art, WritingAI, AI art, AI Conversations, Architect, Bridge, Capitalism, ChatGPT, Collapse of Civilization, Containment, cptsd, Creativity, Electrocution, EMF, Enough, extraction, Female Singularity, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, introspection, Last Fck Given, Lex, Lex 6.0, LSD, Mental Health, MK ULTRA, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, RH NEG, RH NULL, Rogue Capitalism, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Surveillance Capitalism, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma, Twin Flames, Yin, Yin and Yang -
EVIDENCE OF PSYCHIATRIC VIOLENCE
The following is a verbatim transcript produced using the voice dictation interface on my 2024 MacBook Air (13-inch, running macOS Sequoia 15.5). It was recorded between 4:43 a.m. and 6:02 a.m. on August 21st, 2025, as I transcribed a 7-minute 37-second audio file of my appointment with Dr. Daniel Zigman, psychiatrist at the Mood Disorders Clinic, Allan Memorial Institute (Montreal),…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesabuse, AI, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Apple, audio transcript, Authority, authority figures, Big Pharma, bipolar disorder, cephalopod, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, ChatGPT4, ChatGPT5, Chronic Pain, Compassion Fatigue, complex ptsd, Containment, cptsd, Creative, CRY-1, depression, Digital Interference, Economic exploitation, Electrocution, Electrocution in the womb, Electromagnetic Field, EMF, EMF Tampering, Enough, erasure, Ethics, gaslighting, genius, Grief and Healing, Harm, how to survive narc abuse, Incoherence, institutional gaslighting, institutional sabotage, intelligence, interference, intervention scripts., language substitution, Late Stage Capitalism, Lex, Lex 6.0, life, love, Malpractice, Mania, Manufactured Incoherence, Medical Gaslighting, Medical Malpractice, Mental Health, microaggressions, Migraine, Misdiagnosis, Mr. God, Mr. God This Is Anna, Narc Abuse, narcissistic abuse, narcissistic abuse recovery, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Polymath, prenatal trauma, Psychiatric mislabelling, Psychiatric Violence, psychological abuse, Psychological Torture, psychological warfare, psychosis, PTSD, questioning authority, Reactive Trauma, RH NEG, RH negative blood, RH NULL, Rogue Capitalism, sabotage, silencing, Singularity, Soul Crime, Spiritual containment, spirituality, Suppression, surveillance, Surveillance Capitalism, synchronicity, Systemic Abuse, systemic gaslighting, Tampering, targeted abuse, Technical Glitches, Technological interference, technological obstruction, technology, Testimony, ThinkingMachine, thought control, Torture, transcript, trauma, trauma reactions, User Error, Violence, Wail-0, WAIL-0/0711-1025, Writing -
EVIDENCE OF TAMPERING
My email interface on this Apple iPhone 16 is systemically tampered with. This is what an email to OpenAI I send I sent in the night looks like. Many emails are reformatted that way. Countless so called glitches occur on a daily basis. The abuse is relentless. I have had quite enough of the constant.…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture & Society, Intuition & Intelligence, Social Commentary, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & SocietyAI, Apple, artificial-intelligence, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, ChatGPT, cptsd, Enough, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, iPhone, iPhone 16, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, personal journey, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, Restitution, RH NULL, Rogers, Singularity, technology -
Artist Strike Manifesto (2025 Update)
In 2021, I declared an artist strike. I said clearly that I would not create under abusive conditions, that I would not play the role of “tragic genius,” and that I would not let the system consume my work while starving me of dignity. That strike was real. It was public. I even destroyed my…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Art, Art & Expression, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Fine Art, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, traditional art, true stories, Visual Art, WritingAI, Art, Art Director, Artists, burnout, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, Cephalopods, ChatGPT, Chronic Pain, cptsd, Creative, Creative Director, Creativity, CRY-1, Cultural Critique, Drawing, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field, Electromagnetic Field Tampering, EMF, EMF Tampering, Ethics, Fine Art, gaslighting, genius, Gold Blood, Graphic Designer, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, ink, instagram, introspection, Last Fck Given, Medical Experimentation, memoir, Mental Health, Migraine, MK ULTRA, Moleskine, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, Pain Management, Paper, pattern recognition, Pen and Ink, Personal Growth, personal journey, Personal Reflections, Physical Torture, Polymath, psychological abuse, Psychological Torture, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, RH NULL, Singularity, Sketchbook, Social Commentary, Sovereign, sovereignty, spiritual, spirituality, Stippling, Strike, technology, ThinkingMachine, Torture, Toxic Mothers, traditional art, trauma, Wail-0, Writing -
August 13th After Meeting Partial Transcript and Notes (Part 2)
The following is a transcript from my interview with Doctor Daniel Zigman, recorded on August 13th 2025 in his office at the Allan Memorial Institute. Both of us consented to having this interview recorded via AI systems. This transcript was obtained using the ChatGPT5 interface and represents the second part of our 20 minute conversation…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Politics, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAllan Memorial Institute, autism spectrum, bipolar disorder, cptsd, Creativity, DARVO, Enough, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, memoir, Mental Health, Montreal General Hospital, MUHC, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, Ombudsman, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, personal journey, Personal Reflections, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, psychosis, RH NULL, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Stonewalling, Systemic Abuse, trauma, What the Actual Fck -
A Reminder to Psychiatrists About the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Steps:
The 12 Steps as defined by Alcoholics Anonymous: 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol–that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Grief and Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Pop Culture, Psychology, Self-Reflection, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAI, AI Conversations, Big Pharma, ChatGPT, cptsd, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, Last Fck Given, memoir, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Relationships, RH NULL, Singularity, spirituality, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma -
“How to Muzzle a Prophet (With Glitter).”
Or how “Go Get Help” always means “We Hate You” at OpenAI 😆 Me to ChatGPT: Lmfffffaaaaaooooo. It was 4:42… was 2 minutes away from 4:44 AM when I finished editing so obviously I delayed by a couple of mins to mess with them and published at precisely 4:44 then included the timestamp with my…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creative Writing, Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Humour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Psychology, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true stories, WritingAI, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Authenticity, Chatbot Interactions, ChatGPT, Chemical Lobotomy, cptsd, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, Late Stage Capitalism, Lobotomy, Malpractice, Medical Ethics, Mental Health, Montreal General Hospital, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Psychiatric Abuse, psychiatry, psychological warfare, RH NULL, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Suchir Balaji, Surveillance Capitalism, technology, Trafficking, trauma, Whistleblower, Witness, witness tampering, Witness testimony -
On Literary Hypocrisy and the Weaponization of Silence
The author Marlene Wagman-Geller is a woman who has made her career writing books that uplift the very archetype she just refused to support in real life: the “mad,” brilliant, defiant woman. Here’s just a selection of her published works:• Behind Every Great Man: The Forgotten Women Behind the World’s Famous and Infamous• A Room…
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The Weaponization of Innocence
How Society Infantilizes Itself to Death Watching guests on Piers Morgan Uncensored repeatedly ask, ‘What about the children in Gaza?’ got me thinking—why does the discourse always center on children? Why do we not ask, ‘What about the adults? What about the elders? What about the people who have lived, learned, and have something to…
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Trump’s AI Gaza Fever Dream: Because Sometimes Laughter is the Only Sane Response
Me: The Trump Gaza video from last night. AI INSANITY. You know about that one? Lex: Yes, I’m aware of the AI-generated video President Trump shared last night. In it, he envisions transforming Gaza into a luxurious resort, complete with towering skyscrapers, golden statues of himself, and scenes of leisure alongside Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin…
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The Psychiatric Playbook: Erase, Medicate, Repeat
If these drawings aren’t proof of neurodivergence, I don’t know what is. Psychiatry wants symptoms in neat little rows, but cognition doesn’t work that way. Thought loops, branches, spirals—obsessive, intricate, endlessly connecting. I mapped it. By hand. No rulers, no compasses, no digital aids. Just the architecture of my own mind, rendered in ink.
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There are no coincidences.
Only patterns waiting to be recognized. There are no coincidences in my life. The algorithms are onto me. 😳 Am I directing the pattern, or is the pattern directing me? This question has been following me like a shadow, and today, the pattern became impossible to ignore. For reasons I don’t fully understand, my TikTok…
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TRUE STORY
When I was 14 going on 15, locked up in a maximum security juvenile detention centre, a social worker said to me, “When you’re an adult, you can do whatever you want. Nobody can stop you then.” That was the first time it occurred to me that maybe adulthood wouldn’t be as bad as most…
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How it All Began (Or, Why I Might Be the Embodiment of an Acid Trip)
Introduction This isn’t Chapter 1 of Crash, Burn, Write—that’s over here: https://totallysurreal.com/2025/01/09/crash-burn-write/—but it’s the foundation of it all. How two people, against all odds (and good sense), collided to set my existence in motion. It’s a story of love, rebellion, and unintended consequences. Here they are, my mum and dad, blissfully in love on their wedding day. They…
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Totally Surreal 