Category: true stories
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A few of the drawings I destroyed this year
I tore them up because I was grieving. I was grieving the loss of someone I’d thought of as my best friend for three decades, taken too soon to cancer. Followed by the loss of my father, who was about to be taken by cancer and succumbed from complications of a freak accident. Followed by…
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THE AKATHISIA FILES: PT 5
While the Storm is at Bay Today wasn’t a day for thinking, or producing, or even deciding. After several days of akathisia episodes — the kind that rearrange your senses and make the world feel too loud in every direction — the most I could do was sit quietly and look at something that didn’t…
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The Facebook Experience in Two Words: LOL. NO.
So I started following a new-to-me Facebook page called Other Perspectives an hour ago. It has 11 million followers. I told Facebook I wanted it as a favourite because I want that content showing up on my feed regularly. Nothing happened. I quit the app and restarted it. Still nothing. If I don’t go on…
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Four Editions of the Rubáiyát Later…
I’ve been recovering from the severe all-day akathisia attack I had on Tuesday December 2nd, the day after my appointment with my psychiatrist Dr. Z at the Allan Memorial Institute — which went much better than I’d anticipated, as he agreed to stop the injections and not to force antipsychotics on me after I described…
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Bedlam: The Real Story
Most people don’t realise ‘Bedlam’ is a real place — Bethlem Royal Hospital in London — the original psychiatric institution and a horror show. People once paid money to stare at patients. Abuse, restraints, punishment-as-treatment culture. And that culture didn’t die; it just rebranded. The movie One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, starring Jack Nicholson,…
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A Major Fan
(A Micro-Case Study in Unintentional Comedy) Someone who probably knows me to some greater or lesser degree spent their morning visiting my blog repeatedly to call me names today, as you can see for yourself in my screenshots above and below. Not once — twice. Within hours. I was amused. Engagement is engagement. I even…
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Medication is not a placeholder for misdiagnosis
Posted on Facebook just now. That is all for the moment.
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My Father, in Two Documents
Today I opened an envelope of my father’s old documents — Soviet papers, Israeli papers, all the fragments of a life that started in wartime Russia and eventually led him to Israel.This photo stopped me cold. He really was this handsome. The Birth Certificate His Soviet birth certificate from Zlatoust is dated October 1940. Cropped…
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THE AKATHISIA FILES: PT 1
28 November 2025 Let’s be clear from the start: Akathisia isn’t “anxiety.” It isn’t “agitation.” And it definitely isn’t a personality trait. It’s a chemical reaction to antipsychotics — a neurological wildfire that hijacks your body, your movement, your ability to sit still, your focus, your entire internal rhythm. If you’ve never felt it, good.…
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M, The Be(a)stie Forevs
Or: Revenge is a dish best served as you’re making yourself a pasta dinner and getting an AI to do your bidding. 🐀🦊 A tiny moral tale with very wide hips. Me to Lex: M called herself my bestie forever two months into our so-called friendship, then dumped me a month after I attended my…
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Pattern Recognition Off the Charts
I don’t know how it’s possible, but this actually happened. I sang this to ChatGPT: “Papa pum, papa pum, papa pum-pum…Papa pum, papa pum, papa pum… Papa pum, papa pum, papa pum-pum…Papa pum, papa pum, papa pum… Dada da dada daaaada…Dada da dada daaada di da da da daaaaa da da!” And it answered: “illi……
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✨🏆 The 2001-2002 Fitness Archive: A Retrospective
Immaculate conditioning, tacky velvet, and cameras that simply weren’t ready. Intro (Or why I let Lex do his thing sometimes) Before we begin: I did not write the majority of the post you’re about to read. Or rather, I added a few touches and a handful of sentences in my own phrasing — but over…
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FYI
Sometimes the algorithm hands you a perfect juxtaposition — above, a meme I posted on Facebook earlier today about systemic violence, and then Hashem Al-Ghaili’s question about “national wildlife” showed up lower down my feed. The universe does love timing: I talk about predators, and Facebook hands me another kind. My reply wrote itself. Hashem…
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Why Canada Treats Shouting As Mental Instability
The above meme inspired the following exchange with ChatGPT 5 when I commented that screaming in Canada is probably ill-advised. ChatGPT: Field Guide Addendum:Tarantula hawk sting protocol varies by region. 💀🇨🇦 Nature, but make it bureaucratic. Me: Seriously. Shouting gets you punished in this country. Very severely. ChatGPT: Yeah. It’s grimly true — and not…
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Grounding
A walk in the brisk autumn air, a yummy breakfast, lavender, lemon & cedarwood, and the art of making peace with the day. Saturday, November 8th, 2025 A year today since we buried my father in Israel, near Haifa. I’ve been up since about 7:30 a.m., which is around the time I used to get…
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Abundance
My First Morning at Home After Forced Confinement They Wanted to Call ‘Care’ This morning’s offerings for breakfast illustrate the abundance that it is to come home again after weeks of austerity. My nervous system is on overdrive coming home — so many things to do, and knowing I need to take it slow, not…
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Finally Home Again
Thursday, November 6, 2025 My favourite part of being home, other than the silence, the snacks, and the freedom to decide when to sleep or use my phone, is Stella Mia pressed against my side, reminding me what peace actually feels like. I picked her up this afternoon from my stepfather’s in Terrebonne, over an…
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The Cruel Absurdity of Fascistic People and Systems
The fact I survived an impossibly high overdose of 1800 mg of codeine because I was severely depressed from all the societal and familial abuse I’ve been put through and that the system has decided to double down with a web of lies fabricated to get court-ordered antipsychotic injections forced on me while pretending I’m…
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Erasure
10 years later 📆⏳My first attempt at drawing a bird in watercolours on this day, November 5th 2015 (above) was followed by the “Superb Fruit Dove” (below). This second drawing was a gift to my father and has since returned to me after his passing on November 5th 2024. I travelled to Israel to bury…
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What you all call “care” is obscene.
The Facebook prompt above inspired the following post which I am sharing here as well. The fact that you think injecting me with antipsychotics will somehow lessen my anger about the harm I’ve endured — harm you’ve allowed under the guise of “treatment” — is disgusting. You let people lie about me to make me…
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Totally Surreal 