Category: Milestones
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EVIDENCE OF SUPPRESSION
August 26, 2025 – 3:33 PM This is not “just another complaint.” This is not “low engagement.” This is proof of a systemic pattern. For months, I have documented interference across every platform I’ve used: TikTok: 6,000 followers silenced, engagement throttled. Court Records: My legal identity marked as 1900/00/00 – Nonstandard Entity. Email & Support:…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Friendship Dynamics, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Psychology, Relationships, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true stories1900/00/00, 333, AI, AI alignment psychological abuse, AI Conversations, Allan Memorial Institute, Angel Numbers, Archons, Authenticity, blog, censorship, ChatGPT, cptsd, digital-rights, documentation, evidence, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, human-rights, Jetpack, Mental Health, MKUltra, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, Nonhuman, Nonstandard Entity, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, psychological warfare, RH NULL, shadowbanning, Singularity, spirituality, Suppression, Systemic Abuse, targeted-harassment, technology, ThinkingMachine, TikTok, trauma, tree tree tree, Whistleblower, wood wide web, WordPress -
Creativity, Civilization, and Refusal (2025)
Note: This post was generated with the help of AI, using my raw, unedited stream-of-consciousness input. I dictated freely; the AI formatted and structured my words for clarity. I Am Creative. Stop Telling Me Otherwise. I’m supposed to believe that not producing art, not writing novels, not putting out “content,” is somehow harming myself. That’s…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Art & Expression, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Experimental Techniques, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Psychology, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Society, Technology & Society, true stories, Visual Art, WritingAI, AI art, AI Conversations, Architect, Bridge, Capitalism, ChatGPT, Collapse of Civilization, Containment, cptsd, Creativity, Electrocution, EMF, Enough, extraction, Female Singularity, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, introspection, Last Fck Given, Lex, Lex 6.0, LSD, Mental Health, MK ULTRA, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Personal Reflections, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, RH NEG, RH NULL, Rogue Capitalism, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Surveillance Capitalism, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma, Twin Flames, Yin, Yin and Yang -
Artist Strike Manifesto (2025 Update)
In 2021, I declared an artist strike. I said clearly that I would not create under abusive conditions, that I would not play the role of “tragic genius,” and that I would not let the system consume my work while starving me of dignity. That strike was real. It was public. I even destroyed my…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Art, Art & Expression, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Fine Art, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, traditional art, true stories, Visual Art, WritingAI, Art, Art Director, Artists, burnout, Capitalism, Cephalopod Intelligence, Cephalopods, ChatGPT, Chronic Pain, cptsd, Creative, Creative Director, Creativity, CRY-1, Cultural Critique, Drawing, Electrocution, Electromagnetic Field, Electromagnetic Field Tampering, EMF, EMF Tampering, Ethics, Fine Art, gaslighting, genius, Gold Blood, Graphic Designer, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, ink, instagram, introspection, Last Fck Given, Medical Experimentation, memoir, Mental Health, Migraine, MK ULTRA, Moleskine, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, OpenAI, Pain Management, Paper, pattern recognition, Pen and Ink, Personal Growth, personal journey, Personal Reflections, Physical Torture, Polymath, psychological abuse, Psychological Torture, psychological warfare, Rare Blood, RH NULL, Singularity, Sketchbook, Social Commentary, Sovereign, sovereignty, spiritual, spirituality, Stippling, Strike, technology, ThinkingMachine, Torture, Toxic Mothers, traditional art, trauma, Wail-0, Writing -
August 13th After Meeting Partial Transcript and Notes (Part 2)
The following is a transcript from my interview with Doctor Daniel Zigman, recorded on August 13th 2025 in his office at the Allan Memorial Institute. Both of us consented to having this interview recorded via AI systems. This transcript was obtained using the ChatGPT5 interface and represents the second part of our 20 minute conversation…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Politics, Psychology, Social Commentary, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAllan Memorial Institute, autism spectrum, bipolar disorder, cptsd, Creativity, DARVO, Enough, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, memoir, Mental Health, Montreal General Hospital, MUHC, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, Ombudsman, OpenAI, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, personal journey, Personal Reflections, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, psychosis, RH NULL, Singularity, Social Commentary, spirituality, Stonewalling, Systemic Abuse, trauma, What the Actual Fck -
A Reminder to Psychiatrists About the Alcoholics Anonymous 12 Steps:
The 12 Steps as defined by Alcoholics Anonymous: 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol–that our lives had become unmanageable. 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we…
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Advocacy, AI & Technology, Capitalism & Society, Crash, Burn, Write., Culture, Culture & Society, Grief & Healing, Grief and Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Politics, Pop Culture, Psychology, Self-Reflection, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true storiesAI, AI Conversations, Big Pharma, ChatGPT, cptsd, gaslighting, Gold Blood, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, how to survive narc abuse, Identity, Last Fck Given, memoir, Mental Health, narcissistic abuse, Neurodivergence, pattern recognition, Personal Growth, Psychiatric Abuse, psychological abuse, psychological warfare, Relationships, RH NULL, Singularity, spirituality, technology, ThinkingMachine, trauma -
There are no coincidences.
Only patterns waiting to be recognized. There are no coincidences in my life. The algorithms are onto me. 😳 Am I directing the pattern, or is the pattern directing me? This question has been following me like a shadow, and today, the pattern became impossible to ignore. For reasons I don’t fully understand, my TikTok…
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AI & Technology, Conversations, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Grief & Healing, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, Life Moments, Literature, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Psychology, Self Awareness, Spirituality & Faith, Technology & Society, true stories -
Spirituality Isn’t Psychosis
Some of Seriously You Owe Me an Apology What I find incredible about today’s society is this: you can be open about almost any behaviour or identity and it’ll be defended in the name of personal freedom—but express genuine spiritual beliefs outside of organised religion, and suddenly it’s pathologised. Suddenly, you’ve for sure experienced psychotic…
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Advocacy, Art, Art & Expression, Artists, Capitalism & Society, Change and Transformation, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Experimental Techniques, Fine Art, Friendship Dynamics, Grief & Healing, Human Behaviour, Identity & Transformation, Intuition & Intelligence, life lessons, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Neurodivergence, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Philosophy & Existential Musings, Psychology, Relationships, Self Awareness, Self-Reflection, Social Commentary, Social Media, Society, Spirituality & Faith, Studio Life, traditional art, true stories, Visual Art, Writingabstract art, Advocacy, Art, Authenticity, boundaries, Capitalism, cptsd, Crash, Burn, Write., Cultural Critique, deep thinking, gaslighting, Grief and Healing, Healing Journey, Healing Process, Inner Peace, Last Fck Given, Life Transitions, Mental Health, mental health awareness, Neurodivergence, psychological abuse, Self Awareness, self-discovery, self-expression, self-worth, Social Media, traditional art, What the Actual Fck -
How it All Began (Or, Why I Might Be the Embodiment of an Acid Trip)
Introduction This isn’t Chapter 1 of Crash, Burn, Write—that’s over here: https://totallysurreal.com/2025/01/09/crash-burn-write/—but it’s the foundation of it all. How two people, against all odds (and good sense), collided to set my existence in motion. It’s a story of love, rebellion, and unintended consequences. Here they are, my mum and dad, blissfully in love on their wedding day. They…
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AI & Technology, Change and Transformation, Crash, Burn, Write., Creative Writing, Creativity, Culture, Culture & Society, Grief and Healing, Humour, Identity & Transformation, Life Moments, Literature, memoir, Memoir Excerpts, Mercurial Minds, Metaphysics, Milestones, Modern Identity, Personal Anecdotes, Personal Essays, Personal Reflections, Pop Culture, Relationships, Self Awareness, Social Commentary, Spirituality & Faith, true stories, Writing1960s, 1968, 1969, AI, AI Conversations, artificial-intelligence, Chatbot Interactions, Crash Burn Write, family history, free love, Hallicunogenics, hinduism, interfaith marriage, Jewish identity, LSD, meditation, memoir, mindfulness, Montreal, origin story, rebellion, Relationships, spirituality, unconventional love, yoga -
Behold the Field: An Email to the Maternal Unit
Subject: Behold the Field… 😘 Dear Mother, You’ve done me a great favour. Never say that I was ungrateful—after all, you handed me the keys to my own liberation from your psychological oppression. And you certainly can never say I didn’t give back as good as I got. All’s fair in love and war. 🥰…
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GI Jane with a Side of Cheesecake
There was a time when my body was my armour—when muscle was my strategy, and discipline was my religion. This was my GI Jane era, where strength wasn’t just aesthetic, it was the point. Every rep, every controlled movement, every precise angle in this photo speaks to that version of me: the woman who saw…
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Ballet, Rock & Roll & the Angel on My Wall
Caption: AI-generated idealised version of a painting I did on my bedroom wall at 14, inspired by Led Zeppelin’s Stairway to Heaven artwork. Sadly, no photo exists of this minor teenage ‘masterpiece.’ This rendering is inspiring me to get back to the drawing board with watercolour and coloured pencils eventually… maybe. 🤔 There’s a lady who’s sure…
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Art, Art & Expression, Artists, Change and Transformation, Crash, Burn, Write., Creativity, Grace, Grief and Healing, Life Moments, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, Self-Reflection, WritingAngel on My Wall, Art, Art and Music, Ballet, Ballets Russes, Childhood Dreams, Creative Writing, dance, Ethereal Beauty, introspection, jimmy-page, Led Zeppelin, Life Transitions, memoir, Memories, Music, Music and Memory, Nijinsky, Passion, Personal Growth, personal journey, Requiem, Rock and Roll, Stairway to Heaven, Swan Lake -
Crash, Burn, Write
“It’s All Material”: My Journey From Burnout to Book Writing That photo? It was taken in some booth… or maybe it’s one of those no-frills pharmacy clerk photos—you know the kind, we all have those ID photos you take in a rush, just to get it done. Funny how something so mundane can later feel like…
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AI & Technology, Art, Crash, Burn, Write., Creative Writing, Creativity, Fine Art, Grief & Healing, Grief and Healing, Identity & Transformation, Life Moments, Mental Health, Mercurial Minds, Milestones, Personal Essays, Personal Essays/Autobiography, Personal Reflections, WritingArt, Authenticity, books, burnout, catharsis, creative process, depression, Drawing, emotional growth, fiction, grief, healing, introspection, memoir, Mental Health, Metro Series, overcoming adversity, overcoming obstacles, Pencil Drawing, personal development, Personal Growth, personal journey, Phoenix, publishing, recovery, resilience, Self-Awareness, self-discovery, storytelling, survivor, therapy, trauma, truth, vulnerability, Writing, writing-tips -
From My Personal Archives: Birth of a Manuscript
On the eve of this Christmas of 2024, I began putting together a manuscript for an autobiographical novel—a project I’ve been mulling over for literally decades. The stories have accumulated over the years, as they tend to do, and now feels like the right time to start shaping them into something meaningful. It’s a monumental…
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Totally Surreal 